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First market’s comment:
This thesis is hugely improved in comparison to the earlier drafts I have seen. But it still has some serious shortcomings.
The standard of written English is poor, and the thesis seems short in length. The definition of term and related theories reviews are basic-not much is made of them in term of building an argument to define what role marketing can play in creating sustainable global consumption patterns.
The 4 case studies of businesses are not analysed in great detail and the relevant marcomms or materials are not always shown, and the significance and implications of these cases for global question beging considered are not adequately described.
Untimately, the question is not answered with a specific set of recommendations about the positive role marketing and PR could play. Not enough is said about social marketing ; governmental , NGO and public sector marketing , marketing , culture, consumerism and globalization, and in particular the legal status and regulation of marketing and marcomms to reduce the negative effects of marketing on the environment.
This was a big challenging and interdisciplinary topic for her to tackle, and she made significant progress over the summer in terms of academic rigour, critical analysis and originality, but even so she struggled to master all the evidence and theory needed to engage effectively with this topic.
Second Marker’s comments:
The 1st marker’s comments seem fair; this is clearly a dissertation that she has struggled to write.
Some attempt to take a critical approach is made in chapter 3, but ultimately chapter 3 & 4 ‘do not work, the cases studies are briefly in chapter 3, but not developed in chapter 4.
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